Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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