so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
