love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
