She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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