i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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