you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
