was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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