it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
