Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
