I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
The power of my boobs compel you
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize