i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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