Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
