so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
