Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
try to milk me bitch
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
