I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
