Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
We have so much sex to catch up on
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
