thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
