Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
We left the knife in your bed.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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