just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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