Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
