its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
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