i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
