I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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