Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize