hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
