I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
