She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
