Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize