Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
