Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
