I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
