Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
