Sponge bath it is.
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
