What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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