If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
