Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
