he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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