I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
