i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
