Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
