she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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