the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
how drunk are you?
Several
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize