As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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