I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
