"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Even my vagina gasped.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
