Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
