So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
