So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
The power of my boobs compel you
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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