Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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