It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize