she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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