just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I'm getting married
To pizza
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
